Work promotion....and the tension that has followed-advice anyone?

[Mechanic Bob]

I don't know what we are going to do with out you, come Monday we are going to find out.

I always said, "If you think the company cannot exist without you, you are not getting paid enough."

I have had to get rid of an excellent "Job Performer", but the attitude was very Toxic. Everything went much smoother once that person was out of the picture.

[Babe Winkleworm]

You walking into a position of stress and tension. You will find the guys you work closely with will treat you different like. Simple things like when you walk up they will stop talking and won't joke with you like they used too. My best advice after 20 years of doing the same thing. Just be a friend, have an open door of they need to talk. I have been gone now almost a year and still have my old guys call me to chat and or ask me a question about how something was done.

[MadYakker]

I would not treat the employees as "a friend"- but you should be "friendly". You will find a whole bunch of sycophants (toadies, butt-kissers, etc.) start to be buddy-buddy with you. Those who have enough pride and self confidence to NOT do that will think of themselves as 'on the outs' because you don't engage in the "buddy-buddy chit chat" with them. You have to maintain the separation and not increase any alienation between the sycophants and "wanna be Golden Children" and those who do not play the butt kissing game. Women flirting with a boss is a similar dynamic. I've had bosses that had "work buddies" that they would do stuff wioth outside work, those who were flattered by flirts and then the normal, mature work relation ship folks. The normal folks who maintain a normal boss/employee relationship can get the raw end of the deal if the boss does not know when he is being played by all his new "friends". They will just as quickly stab you in the back if that will benefit them.

[BMCD]

Been on both sides of this. Hopefully they talked with the other person before announcing your promotion.

[cbr900racer22]

If anyone has advice as to how you handled a similar situation, feel free to offer it up. I'd be glad to hear it.

PIIHB.

[jrbdad]

Just get a hat the says "The BOSS". That will help. Anything else i can do let me know. lol

[richg99]

The day I gave up managment (small office with ten sales people) and went back to sales full-time, I doubled my income and tripled my happiness.

[BigSexyPhoenix]

My opinion for what it's worth is to take her to lunch immediately.
If tension is that bad now, it won't get any better. Work it out. Don't get angry of overbearing. Listen to her side; let her air it out, don't get defensive and interject or interrupt her with your viewpoint. When she is done. Reiterate that you need her help and experince. That together you and her working together can make your little town a great place to live and work.

Please, do not listen to this advice. Taking her to lunch would put you in the unemployment line faster than anything. If she is mad at you all she would have to do is say that you touched her or said something inappropriate. This is why you don’t take serious advice from a fishing site. I would make dang sure that anytime I was around her it was in a highly visible place with witnesses if possible. Do not ever get in a situation where you are alone with her.

[fish365]

INVOLVE HR! You didn't hire/promote yourself, so her issue is not with you. HR must be involved and prepared incase it escalates, especially if she tries to go legal and file gender discrimination lawsuit, etc.

^^^This. Don't have a one on one without a witness or HR. Go on record with someone higher up. Document and date everything.

[csurp]

Please, do not listen to this advice. Taking her to lunch would put you in the unemployment line faster than anything. If she is mad at you all she would have to do is say that you touched her or said something inappropriate. This is why you don’t take serious advice from a fishing site. I would make dang sure that anytime I was around her it was in a highly visible place with witnesses if possible. Do not ever get in a situation where you are alone with her.

This and never behind a closed door, without HR present to retain her right to privacy/ If HR cant be present reschedule.

[MadYakker]

There are a whole lot of people here who think of women in the work place as a ticking time bomb ready to yell "rape!" or "he teched me!"! Those instances are much more widely publicized than actually happening. Having someone babysit the two of you in a simple one on one meeting would be a transparent display of lack of trust. Thinking HR being in the room would get you off to a good start is wrong on several points- 1. Shows that you think she is going to trap you and 2. Shows HR that you can't handle the HR part of your job and need them to hold your hand. 3. Might also tell them that you don't trust YOURSELF, either 4. Like it or not, but keeping it 100%"real"- is this woman someone who looks like you would WANT to molest her?

[csurp]

There are a whole lot of people here who think of women in the work place as a ticking time bomb ready to yell "rape!" or "he teched me!"! Those instances are much more widely publicized than actually happening. Having someone babysit the two of you in a simple one on one meeting would be a transparent display of lack of trust. Thinking HR being in the room would get you off to a good start is wrong on several points- 1. Shows that you think she is going to trap you and 2. Shows HR that you can't handle the HR part of your job and need them to hold your hand. 3. Might also tell them that you don't trust YOURSELF, either 4. Like it or not, but keeping it 100%"real"- is this woman someone who looks like you would WANT to molest her?

Involving HR, shows you know how to handle the job. This is not a three strikes yer out situation...it's one and done.

[GOTTA BIG SACK]

There are a whole lot of people here who think of women in the work place as a ticking time bomb ready to yell "rape!" or "he teched me!"! Those instances are much more widely publicized than actually happening.

The women I work with are more fun than the men and they can bring the guy/smack talk also. If HR heard some of the stuff we say with the women around here we'd all be on leave.

[csurp]

The women I work with are more fun than the men and they can bring the guy/smack talk also. If HR heard some of the stuff we say with the women around here we'd all be in leave.

I once managed a small federal office in a building that was also occupied by our state sister agency. The state people had a cute secretary who always seemed to be "one of the guys". When I found my people joining them around her desk telling off-color jokes etc, I immediately hauled them into the conference room, closed the door and read them the riot act about sexual harassment. The bottom line of my lecture was that a guy, particularly one in a position of power over a subordinate female, has no idea how the woman actually feels about this kind of behavior. She may think she has to tolerate it to keep her job. Call me a prude if you will, but my guys behaved like gentlemen after that.

[Jeff Hahn]

I once managed a small federal office in a building that was also occupied by our state sister agency. The state people had a cute secretary who always seemed to be "one of the guys". When I found my people joining them around her desk telling off-color jokes etc, I immediately hauled them into the conference room, closed the door and read them the riot act about sexual harassment. The bottom line of my lecture was that a guy, particularly one in a position of power over a subordinate female, has no idea how the woman actually feels about this kind of behavior. She may think she has to tolerate it to keep her job. Call me a prude if you will, but my guys behaved like gentlemen after that.

It’s not a matter of being a prude. It’s all about minimizing the risk of the company being sued for millions.

[218_fishing]

Document with upper management and fire her.

sorry been in the role before with exact same situation.
she isn’t worth it, if she keeps pulling that crap and gets the same out come.

[GOTTA BIG SACK]

Since this was discussed on another thread it just came to mind. Give her a christmas gift in the form of a "dick in the Box". The tension may not be work related.

[castforcash]

Give her a firm smack in the ass, then tell her to make you a sandwich

[ryancompetition]

These things happen and everyone handles them differently so being patient is probably your best course of action.

Also, if the promotion isn't in effect yet then this is still your boss' issue to handle and should be involved.

They'll know the reason for the decision and you currently do not so anything you do at this point will be out of assumption and can lead to issue.

A bad attitude is one thing but bad behaviors are another so just focus on it if it prevents you from performing in your new role.

Just food for thought but I always paid attention to someone when they were told no on a promotion to see their behavior.
If they acted professional and mature then I knew they were solid and considered them for something else.
If they threw a fit and undermined the new leader then it confirmed my decision and I'd release them.

You never know but this could possibly turn in to one of your best employees.

Welcome to leadership :)